When I first dreamed about homeschooling, I had a lovely vision.
It involved matching uniforms, a tidy little table, color-coded binders and perfectly behaved children sitting at a spacious table like a miniature classroom—disciplined, structured, sweetly obedient.
And as most homeschool moms may tell you…that vision is completely unrealistic! Actually, it is common for mothers who hold tightly to this classroom vision to give up on homeschooling altogether!
“I just couldn’t get my children to listen to me.”
“I wish we could have continued to homeschool, but my kids couldn’t stay focused.”
“I was going crazy trying to keep up with our curriculum!”
One of the first things I have learned about home education is this:
“Homeschooling isn’t about recreating school at home. It’s about viewing learning as a way of life.”
Many mothers find once they let go of high expectations begin to embrace the natural rhythms of their family, things became more peaceful—and far more effective.
Learning Through Life
The most surprising part of homeschooling for me has been how much my children pick up on their own. Without formal instruction, I’ve watched them learn math, reading and even logical inference just through our daily environment.
They understand context clues. They make connections. They will say things I never formally sat down and taught them—because they’ve absorbed knowledge naturally, through conversation, play, observation and simply being part of family life.
“The home is the natural environment for initiating a human being into solidarity and communal responsibilities.”
—Catechism of the Catholic Church, 2207
It’s not that we don’t use curriculum- we do. I have fun researching and selecting materials that suit our children’s educational needs. But I’ve found I’m not as glued to it as I originally thought I’d be. I used to imagine I would follow lesson plans to the letter, but in reality, much more is “caught than taught.”
Our Daily Rhythm
If I had to summarize our homeschool rhythm in one phrase, it’s this:
Be structured in the morning, chill in the afternoon.
I have found that during and directly after breakfast is a crucial time in our homeschool. That is when attention spans are strongest and cooperation is highest, so I use that time for anything more structured—math, writing, formal lessons, etc. After lunch, we shift gears into a more relaxed pace: reading aloud, independent exploration, outdoor play, or just time to rest and reset. Science experiments also are saved for the afternoon.
This plan for the day works because it respects our family’s natural rhythms and fits into our life. We don’t fit our life into “school.”
Even as an adult, I find I need to prioritize important tasks first. Tasks that aren’t as much of a priority or that don’t require as high of a degree of “mental bandwidth” work better for the afternoon once the primary tasks have been completed. I am sure this flow will suit my children well throughout their life as it can continue no matter what they do.
Just One Thing This Week
One of the most powerful habits I’ve formed as a homeschooling mom is something I now do every Sunday at Mass.
At some point during the liturgy, usually after the homily, sometimes after com munition- whenever I have a quiet moment, I pause and pray:
“Lord, what is one thing You want me to teach my children this week?”
Almost every time, a particular thing comes to mind. Sometimes it’s a concept, sometimes a virtue, sometimes even a single vocabulary word. When I write it down and intentionally focus on it during the week, it’s as if the rest of our learning flows naturally.
“If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him.”
—James 1:5 (ESV–Catholic Edition)
I also reflect regularly on what each child specifically needs that week or in that season. Maybe one needs more math time. Maybe another needs to focus on learning to tell time. I keep it simple—and that’s why it works.
Not for School, But for Life
There’s a Latin phrase I love:
Non scholae sed vitae discimus
Translation: “We do not learn for school, but for life.”
That phrase as it was the motto of a school I attended many years ago and it has become something of a motto in our homeschool. The goal isn’t to generate perfect test-takers. It’s to raise children who are formed—in heart, mind and soul.
I recently watched an interview of Pope Leo XIV where he rhetorically asked, “How do we teach people to become critical thinkers? How do we teach people to understand that not everything you hear or everything you read should be taken at face value?”
That is the challenge in homeschool. Learning how to teach children to think critically. How can they become lifelong learners?
Children love to learn when they see the beauty of truth.
“All wisdom comes from the Lord and is with him forever.”
—Sirach 1:1 (ESV–Catholic Edition)
A wondrous attitude toward learning is not something you can force through rigid systems or pressure.
And that’s what homeschooling has become for us—
Not a checklist.
Not a performance.
But a daily invitation to grow together in grace. Non Scholae Sed Vitae Discimus!